Here’s some thoughts on the subject of Happiness. I’m no expert, but I’m a student.

Your own Happiness is your Responsibility. Not anyone else’s. If you are Unhappy, it lies within you to fix it.

People don’t make you Happy. You are reacting to the stiuation. The only 3 things we can control in life are:

1. Your actions.
2. Your responses to situations and your experiences.
3. Your thoughts, beliefs, or attitude.

By the way, you can’t fix people. Or change them. Period.

You have to be comfortable with yourself – and love yourself.

Manage Expectations. When I suggest lower your expectations, I’m not saying lower your standards. I’m saying be a little realistic about what will happen or how it will go. For example, if you go to an event that you paid $75 for, don’t have an expectation that the food, drink, crowd and other details will be fabulous. Often that isn’t the case. But if you just expected to meet a few people, have a nice conversation with someone, and relax through the experience, your expectations are set at a more realistic level. Hence, you will be less disappointed. Less often your hopes will be shattered.

I lack Patience. If I had patience, I would likely be happier. I wouldn’t be grumpy in traffic. I think Patience makes waiting for “The One” easier. It makes the wait for the perfect job (whatever that is) easier.

Last thought:  you have to have some kind of map or plan or goal – or you will just float along. Happiness and Fun take some planning. It doesn’t usually happen by itself.  Enjoy the Journey.

I have been using Virtual Assistants for a while. Originally, I went to AssistU.com to put in an RFP. That’s where I met Ricki at Just2Technical.com. Ricki handles all of my bookkeeping and websites (including content and maintenance).

Ricki introduced me to another VA that edited my book. I met Susan from Ace Concierge online. I am getting busier so I am trying to figure out how to delegate better. I need to learn how to utilize my VA better to free up my time, so I can spend more time writing (blogs, articles, book #3); doing podcasts; speaking; consulting; and talking with prospects and clients.

I asked Susan if she had a tele-seminar about How to Use a VA. She didn’t but gave me thoughts. Then I Googled it. This is what I found:

1. WebWorkerDaily has an article about How to Use a VA.
2. Here’s a list of 101 tasks that a VA can do for you.
3. And here’s 30 creative ways to use a VA.
4. The typical MLM article: How to use Virtual Staff to make passive income. I actually have hired a freelancer to write non-technical copy, so anything is possible.

For me, the key is probably control. Susan wrote to me, “It is not easy to delegate what we have always done; to trust another to do it, or to believe someone can complete a project/task as well as we can. Developing a comfort level and knowing that someone can truly and effectively help you manage your business is a learned skill.”

I think it’s my mindset that I can get it done myself faster before I even explain it once. But that’s a falsehood. If I explain it correctly once, the VA can do it over and over. Also, it always takes longer to do something than I think it can (or worse schedule it to). (Like this blog post).

“Solo-preneurs cannot do it all themselves. It is impossible. Something will always suffer for this type of mentality. We all try, but miss the mark,” Susan points out.

I think she is right on the mark with this: “Once you lay the foundation, discuss accountability, responsibility, expectations and deadlines, it comes together. Some tasks may take a little more creativity with training while others, not so much, but in the end, if you think about all you stand to gain with outsourcing, it is a win-win. Just think if you delegated only 4 hrs per week-that is 16 hrs per month to work on income generating activities or have a little more me time.”

Thoughts? [I am going to spend this week thinking about what I can outsource].

Yesterday, I was reading this blog post where social media was re-defined as conversational media — or as I am going to call it conversational marketing.

Let’s face it, social media is about conversation. It is about spreading a message, an idea or a story. But at its foundation it is marketing, because what is marketing but spreading an idea, a story or a message.

Unfortunately, most people are spreading manure and pumping up their own egos. How many were not very good at traditional marketing? Ego doesn’t work well in marketing because it isn’t about YOU, it’s about THEM. The Client. The Customer. The Ratepayer. The Prospect.

Marketing is about getting attention. That’s why people talk about eyeballs and the number of followers or some other metric. It is about Engagement and Listeners. Jeffrey Gitomer asks, “Would you rather have a loyal wife or a satisfied one?”

The same with your followers. Sure, 10K people following you strokes your ego, but if no one is listening or responding or re-tweeting or commenting, what’s the point?

There is a story about 1000 customers being profitable. And 2000 customers makes you lots of profit.

There’s also the mental limit of about 250 – that’s about all the people we can effectively remember and engage with. People with a network of more than 5,000 will tell you it’s possible but I’m going to stick with you can have a Rolodex of thousands, but can only maintain a relationship with about 250.

That brings us around to sales: in sales, it’s about the relationship. They have to like you and trust you to buy from you in most cases.

We forget in this digital age that pre-Internet, PR, marketing, advertising and branding were not always done under one roof. There are still many firms that just handle publicity. Still others only handle branding; while others just do advertising. It’s all under the Marketing umbrella, but they are different arms of that octopus.

Remember too, that in traditional advertising, there was a media buy component and a creative piece. The creative piece was the charge to come up with the campaign – whether it was the story board for the commercial (TV or radio) or the billboard and newsprint ads. The firm created the story that would resonate with your target audience. (Unless it was just a cool ad to win an ADDY, which also happened. A lot.)

The firm would do the media buy for a commission to get your ad on the radio – on the right radio station that hit your demographics; or on the right TV channel, on the targeted TV show, aimed at a targeted demographic. Or the same with a newspaper or magazine ad: who is the target demographic and what do they read.

We seemed to have forgotten all that in the online marketing world. We don’t story board or check where the demographic is or target like a sharpshooter. Instead, we aim for numbers and noise and throwing spaghetti against the wall to see what sticks. If you are going to spend the time, the effort and the money, do it right. The Internet has a long memory.