As I head to the Successful Women’s Conference, here are my thoughts on Success.

People get hung up on success being about fame, power and money. That is certainly one metric to define success. Yet success isn’t a race against the Joneses. Success is about happiness, alignment of values, enjoyment of the journey and maybe even friendships.

Missionaries and non-profits don’t measure success on dollars. The yardstick is how well the idea spreads and sticks. Another measure might be how many people they helped. Certainly $ is needed to accomplish these goals but it isn’t the final determination of success.

We all define it differently for ourselves. If it was just a race to the CEO seat, most people would be unsuccessful, since there a finite number of those positions.

“Life is a journey” means that you will have successes and losses a long the way (if you take any risks at all). It also means you will have to set short and long term goals. Goals help to show you the path. They are something to strive for and grow into.

A long time ago, a pal told me that “He works to live, not lives to work.” Success for him was defined by how little he worked and by how much fun he had.

Some people love to travel. Isn’t it a success when you take a trip to one of your wish destinations?

Most people are not aware of how many people they touch in life or how they affect other people. A certain aspect of that is needed to be considered successful. You can’t do it in a vacuum.

One of my nieces recently reminded me that while I may not see it, my advice has had an effect. it was wonderful to hear.

Friendships are funny. Some are short term; some long. Some are more work than others. If your values lie in making the most of life and family, etc., there’s success to be had here as well.

Charity, community, family, health, hobbies and, yes, career and finance are all different areas that we spend time setting goals. These are all aspects to measuring success. No one area totally defines us. So take stock! And enjoy the journey

Here’s some thoughts on the subject of Happiness. I’m no expert, but I’m a student.

Your own Happiness is your Responsibility. Not anyone else’s. If you are Unhappy, it lies within you to fix it.

People don’t make you Happy. You are reacting to the stiuation. The only 3 things we can control in life are:

1. Your actions.
2. Your responses to situations and your experiences.
3. Your thoughts, beliefs, or attitude.

By the way, you can’t fix people. Or change them. Period.

You have to be comfortable with yourself – and love yourself.

Manage Expectations. When I suggest lower your expectations, I’m not saying lower your standards. I’m saying be a little realistic about what will happen or how it will go. For example, if you go to an event that you paid $75 for, don’t have an expectation that the food, drink, crowd and other details will be fabulous. Often that isn’t the case. But if you just expected to meet a few people, have a nice conversation with someone, and relax through the experience, your expectations are set at a more realistic level. Hence, you will be less disappointed. Less often your hopes will be shattered.

I lack Patience. If I had patience, I would likely be happier. I wouldn’t be grumpy in traffic. I think Patience makes waiting for “The One” easier. It makes the wait for the perfect job (whatever that is) easier.

Last thought:  you have to have some kind of map or plan or goal – or you will just float along. Happiness and Fun take some planning. It doesn’t usually happen by itself.  Enjoy the Journey.

I have been using Virtual Assistants for a while. Originally, I went to AssistU.com to put in an RFP. That’s where I met Ricki at Just2Technical.com. Ricki handles all of my bookkeeping and websites (including content and maintenance).

Ricki introduced me to another VA that edited my book. I met Susan from Ace Concierge online. I am getting busier so I am trying to figure out how to delegate better. I need to learn how to utilize my VA better to free up my time, so I can spend more time writing (blogs, articles, book #3); doing podcasts; speaking; consulting; and talking with prospects and clients.

I asked Susan if she had a tele-seminar about How to Use a VA. She didn’t but gave me thoughts. Then I Googled it. This is what I found:

1. WebWorkerDaily has an article about How to Use a VA.
2. Here’s a list of 101 tasks that a VA can do for you.
3. And here’s 30 creative ways to use a VA.
4. The typical MLM article: How to use Virtual Staff to make passive income. I actually have hired a freelancer to write non-technical copy, so anything is possible.

For me, the key is probably control. Susan wrote to me, “It is not easy to delegate what we have always done; to trust another to do it, or to believe someone can complete a project/task as well as we can. Developing a comfort level and knowing that someone can truly and effectively help you manage your business is a learned skill.”

I think it’s my mindset that I can get it done myself faster before I even explain it once. But that’s a falsehood. If I explain it correctly once, the VA can do it over and over. Also, it always takes longer to do something than I think it can (or worse schedule it to). (Like this blog post).

“Solo-preneurs cannot do it all themselves. It is impossible. Something will always suffer for this type of mentality. We all try, but miss the mark,” Susan points out.

I think she is right on the mark with this: “Once you lay the foundation, discuss accountability, responsibility, expectations and deadlines, it comes together. Some tasks may take a little more creativity with training while others, not so much, but in the end, if you think about all you stand to gain with outsourcing, it is a win-win. Just think if you delegated only 4 hrs per week-that is 16 hrs per month to work on income generating activities or have a little more me time.”

Thoughts? [I am going to spend this week thinking about what I can outsource].